Wednesday, July 27, 2011


Whilst I sit and digest to the sounds of Miles Davis and John McLaughlin performing "Bitches Brew" I figured I'd take the time out to add my two cents on a muesli bar that I came by last night. It seems that the music, as prescribed by one of the jolliest fellows at the Lancefield pub on Tuesday eve, has inspired me to offer forward my thoughts to you.

Before I get into it though I must comment that there is something special about a small country town pub. Far too often great people get lost amidst the urban sprawl, becoming faceless nobodies in a crowd of disinterested individuals. Tuesday night bestowed upon me the pleasure of sharing a room with ten or so patrons from all different generations and walks of life, all with a very unique distinction and willingness to take part in conversation that captivated the entire bar. The barman, by far the youngest person in the room, even joined in the banter as we discussed all things music, cycling, art, football, cricket and parenthood with a well rounded concluding segment on the duties of a male spouse. Brilliant! It's not often I walk away from a drinking establishment with much more than an empty wallet and the need for a kebab.

Now where was I... Ah yes, bodywise muesli bars may have the heart foundation tick of approval and the packaging may feature the words "NUTRITIOUS" and "DELICIOUS", but I assure you the latter is false advertising. This particular bar also claims to provide 1/4 of your daily fibre needs and is therefore marketed featuring "DIGESTIVE BALANCE" on the label. All eating this bar has done for me is left me wanting something tasty to eat and the rumbling in my food processing machinery to disappear.

In conclusion, "Bitches Brew" is good, country pubs are better and making your own muesli bars is best!


  1. Add 5cups of a mixture your favorite nuts, rolled oats & bran to a frying pan at a moderate heat and cook until all ingredients are dehydrated and golden brown.
  2. Pour contents of the pan onto a clean tea towel and wrap them up like a stork would a baby. Then bash the hell out of the mixture to break up some of the bigger nuts.
  3. Add 125g of butter, 1/2 cup of honey and 1/3 cup of brown sugar to the pan and melt at low heat.
  4. Combine butter mixture and dry mix in a large bowl, you can add some chopped dried fruit if you dare to be adventurous also. The mixture should come together once all the ingredients are mixed thoroughly, if this is not the case then add more honey and/or butter.
  5. Line a shallow (30mm deep) tray with baking paper and add the mixture to the tray, flatten the ingredients to the extremities of the tray, cover with another sheet of baking paper and roll flat with a rolling pin or your hands.
  6. Put a weight on top of the contents of the tray and refrigerate for an hour or so. Once mixture is cooled cut it into the portion sizes you desire, store for a week in a plastic airtight container and ENJOY!

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